Trophies and medals for everyone | Letter to the editor

To the editor:

I wish PC promoters and advocates realized how bizarrely silly and foolish they look nixing having the names of students excelling academically appear in the local newspaper.

Their “I suppose you think you’re better than me” mentality — Johnathan Swift and H. L. Mencken, where are you when we need you?

If academic achievers are to be kept under a blanket of censorship so their non-academic achieving contemporaries can remain all cozy and warm and secure protected in safe place PC cocoons, why not quit publishing the names of high school athletes in the sports page, too?

I mean, I myself have been living the past 65 years suffering the emotional travail of never having been able to make my old high school football and basketball teams. Oh, the ignominy of it! Having my sense of self-esteem and self-worth forever hindered and hobbled by the perpetual remembrance of seeing some of my classmates so honored way back when.

And it’s really been tough living this down over the years, let me tell you.

So, I say quit publicizing the names, not only of local academic achievers, but also the names of local athletic achievers, as well.

We must, after all, look out for the tender, fragile, feeble, friable, delicate, vulnerable, helpless sensibilities of all those kids who, because of our prejudicial meritoriously rigged society, never achieve anything worthy of recognition, such as having their names listed on the back pages of a provincial hometown newspaper.

Individual achievements and accomplishments be hanged! Hang one, hang ‘em all, I say! It’s time for all us mediocrities to arise! With the PC phenomenon on our side, our day in the sun has come! All men are created equal. It says so right in the Constitution.

So here’s to trophies and medals and blue ribbons and Oscars for everyone! Regardless of whether it’s a medium rare, béarnaise sauce, filet mignon steak; or a peanut butter sandwich they’re bringing to the table.

TED S. FROST

Arrow Point